How do you really feel about your marriage?
It’s a question that’s often hard to answer honestly, especially when you’ve got kids running you around in circles, you’re trying to come up with what to make for dinner every night and you’re responding to clients on your 5-minute pee break between work hours. It’s no wonder we forget about that whole “til death do us part” bit.
It’s been so quiet in the house having all three kids in school part-time now. With Eric busy making cookies for our cookie business, the silence gave me a moment to reflect on how the way we treat our relationships can ultimately sabotage your business's success.
Also, big shout out to our cookie company, Eat More Kookies (spelled with a K, of course). If you have not ordered our cookies yet, I highly recommend it.
If there’s one thing I have learned – in both 12 years of business and being married – it’s that success lies in the foundation of your relationship.
For many of us, managing a business and parenting means that marriage often takes a backseat. We become so absorbed in keeping our businesses and children thriving that our relationships may suffer.
The constant pressure to manage everything can make it easy to neglect the relationship that’s supposed to be your most significant. This isn’t about feeling ashamed—it’s about recognizing the pattern and making a change.
For any of you ladies out there who experience this disconnect and are wondering how to reignite the spark in your marriage amidst your busy lives, I’m sharing some strategies that have helped so many other women entrepreneurs (including myself) get back on a steady course.
Why Your Marriage Feels Like a Roommate Situation
Here’s the truth: marriages can become mundane or even strained when we're overwhelmed by our daily responsibilities. In the hustle of everyday life, it’s easy for a relationship to evolve from a deep partnership to a mere coexistence.
You might find yourselves drifting apart, feeling more like business partners than life partners. Even though my husband Eric and I have been married for 12 years, there were moments when it felt like we were becoming more like roommates than a married couple.
But, not having a strong marriage isn't just a personal issue, it's a business issue.
This problem is compounded by the constant pressure to excel in both your professional and personal roles, leaving little time or energy for meaningful connections with your partner. Which can ultimately lead to resentment and negative thoughts about them.
We need to circle back to making time for our relationship if we want our business to thrive – but how?
Prioritizing Your Marriage When Business and Parenting Are Overwhelming
The Importance of Awareness
The first step is awareness.
Just as we get caught up in the details of running a business and may lose sight of our original goals, we can also forget the vision we had for our marriage.
Reflect on what you envisioned for your relationship:
Deep conversations
Shared experiences
Emotional connections
Are you living that vision, or are you just checking off daily tasks?
Taking Control
Understand that the issues in your marriage are connected to how you manage other areas of your life. If you’re anxious or overwhelmed by your business to the point where you’re neglecting your partner, that’s a problem that needs addressing.
Start by evaluating what’s on your plate and then identify what you can control and change.
Are you afraid of losing your business, or are you more afraid of losing your marriage?
The choice should be clear: prioritize what aligns with your values and vision.
Practical Steps to Reconnect
Weekly Check-Ins: One effective method is to schedule a weekly check-in with your partner. This doesn’t need to be a long, elaborate affair. For Eric and me, it’s a simple yet powerful practice. We put the kids to bed, turn off the TV, and spend quality time together without distractions. This ritual has sparked some of our most meaningful conversations and helped us stay connected.
Ask the Right Questions: During your check-ins, ask these three questions to facilitate meaningful dialogue:
How did I serve as your partner this week?
What did I do that you want to see more of or that you really enjoyed?
Was there anything I did that you would like to see less of or that you need me to change? These questions foster honest communication and allow you to address both positive aspects and areas for improvement
Lean on Others Who Get It: You don’t have to navigate this alone. The Freecom Collective is a community of like-minded mom entrepreneurs who understand where your head is at.
Apply to experience virtual calls that provide support, validation, and actionable strategies to foster your relationships and create the work-life balance you deserve after all you’ve poured into your business.
Strengthen Your Marriage, Improve Your Business
Balancing a thriving business with a fulfilling marriage is challenging but achievable. By incorporating these strategies—weekly check-ins, acknowledging overwhelm, prioritizing quality time, reframing perspectives, using simple rituals, and seeking professional help if needed—you can create a more connected and supportive relationship.
Remember, your marriage is a partnership that requires ongoing effort and attention.
So, take the time to reflect, make the changes, and invest in your marriage. The rewards will be worth it.
Be sure to follow along on the blog or listen to the podcast for more on life, business and the pursuit of freedom.
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